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Needs That Have Gone Unmet

“No, this is not me; this is somebody else that suffers.

I could never face that, and all that has happened:

Let sackcloth and ashes enshroud it,

And see all the lamps are removed…


Anna Akhmatova

I am a person with needs. We are all people with needs. None of us are different in this.  I suggest that we are not different when it comes to needs being met (or unmet) when we were younger. I am certain that for many of us, some of our important needs were not met when we were small children dependent upon a world of adults to care for us. Now we’re adults, and the feeling of neediness has for many of us, become a chasm within us. And to make things harder, the child within us still feels ashamed because of our needs.

I have learned that even though my closest friend tries each day to make sure that my needs are met, I must help myself. The same holds true for my consideration when I hear my “Voice from within” wonder, “Am I meeting his/her needs?” Unless we help ourselves, our pain and shame will turn into rage, which only empties us, and we cannot run on empty forever, in trying to hide our own true feelings.

Our needs are real, and we have nothing for which to be ashamed. Whether through reaching out to others or whatever tool we gain along our path of personal growth and development, turning to that force which we believe to be greater than our own Self, or trusting any of our other inner resources while in quiet solitude, we can meet our own needs. Each day, I make every effort to be gentle with my “neediness”.  We don’t have to be perfect after all, just real!