Monthly Archives: August 2010

Interpreting the Runes ~ Dagaz ~ Breakthrough ~ Transformation ~ Day

Dagaz

dagaz

Breakthrough

Transformation

Day

Dagaz is the last Rune belonging to the Cycle of Initiation.  Drawing Dagaz often signals a major shift or breakthrough in the process of self-change, a complete transformation in attitude, a 180-degree turn.  For some, the transition is so radical that they are no longer able to live the ordinary life in the ordinary way.

Because the timing is right, the outcome is assured although not, from the present vantage point, predictable.  In each life there comes at least one moment which, if recognized and seized, transforms the course of that life forever.  Rely, therefore on radical trust, even though the moment may call for one’s self to leap empty-handed into the void.  With this Rune the Warrior Nature reveals itself.

If Dagaz is followed by the Blank Rune, the magnitude of the transformation might be so great as to portend a death, the successful conclusion of one’s passage.

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So Many of Us Have a Problem with Anger

Anger as soon as fed is dead. ‘Tis starving makes it fat.”  — Emily Dickinson

I feel I have a problem with anger.  I’m aware of certain acquaintances and friends who identify with anger issues, some of whom are working on anger management with a therapist. Many of us seem to have a problem with anger, often misdirection it and hurting the most innocent and loved people in our life.  This anger we feel may have developed as a result of sexual abuse, neglect, or beatings we may have experienced as children which we turned against ourselves or others in a vicious, repetitive cycle.

When I became aware of my problem with anger, I began work with my therapist to create new tools to cope with my feelings appropriately.  I needed to talk about all the incidents that still tormented me. I encouraged in my sessions to get angry at those that abused me or those I felt victimized by.  I learned that I was likely to go on through life being a victim until I could fight my way through those early situations.  It is often necessary to give one’s self permission to vent anger as an affirmation of self-worth, and not a contradiction of all the lessons learned about being tolerant, forgiving and peace-loving.

It is quite possible to, “hate the deed and not the do-er” by separating in one’s mind, the behavior, from the person.  We have the right to hate what happened to us; we have the right to be angry at people for their aggressive, hurtful acts, while being ready to forgive them as people who need love just as much as we do.  If anger is held back, it will fester and come out in mean and petty ways.  Anger starved will rob us of our dignity and tranquility.

Today I Feel Hatred

Hatred

“If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself” –Herman Hesse

Hatred, just like anger, has the potential to corrode and eats away at me, and I often end up being the loser. My life has been wrecked by the resentments and hostilities I have felt for others.

Why? Because hatred paralyzes me and prevents me from moving forward. I find myself becoming fixed in ugly feuds and rivalries and then I’m unable to go on with a happier life. I am in that dark place today and I am trying to take the necessary time I need to look within myself.   As I become more clear-sighted about my hatreds I find that they are often directed at parts of me that I dislike, or even fear. For example, I may hate a certain noise because I was afraid of a similar noise when I was a child; I may detest others’ sexual preferences because I fear it may secretly be my own.

Today, I despise someone’s manipulation, dishonesty and defensiveness about their previously communicated commitments and the fabricated lies and distortions they have created, all in trying to discredit me and what I know to be the truth.

While looking at this hatred I feel toward this person and being honest with myself, I am beginning to get to the root of my anger and hatred. As I continue this process of looking within I know I will be able to deal with my feelings, and let them be carried away by the winds of time. To help me until I have accomplished this, I have created an affirmation which goes, “I realize that my anger and hatred is often directed at myself. Now I am ready to work to get free of the hatred that cripples me.”

Interpreting the Runes ~ Ansuz ~ Signals ~ Messenger Rune Gift

Ansuz

Ansuz~ Ansur~ Mouth

Ansuz~ Ansur~ Mouth

Signals

Messenger Rune

The God Loki

The keynote here is receiving: messages, signals, gifts.  Even a most timely warning may be seen as a gift.  The message may be that of a new life unfolding.  New lives begin with new connections, surprising linkages that direct you to new pathways. Take care now to be especially aware during meetings, visits, chance encounters, particularly with persons wiser than yourself.  When the Messenger Rune brings sacred knowledge, you are truly blessed.

Loki is that ancient trickster from the pantheon of the Norse Gods.  He is theheyeohkah of the Native Americans, a mocking shadow of the creator god, as well as the bringer of benefits to humankind. He is a reminder that even scoundrels and arch-thieves can be the bearers of wisdom.  When this Rune is drawn, expect the unexpected; the message is always a call, a call to a new life.

Ansuz is the first of the thirteen Runes that make up the Cycle of Initiation -Runes that focus directly upon the mechanism of self-change – and as such, addresses our need to integrate unconscious motive with conscious intent.

Drawing Ansuz indicates that a connection with the Divine is at hand.  It is a signal to explore the depths, the foundations of life, and to experience the inexhaustible wellspring of the Divine in one’s own nature.

At the same time, Ansuz reminds that one must first draw from the well to nourish and give to oneself.  Then, there will be more than enough to nourish others.  A new sense of family solidarity invests this Rune.

Ansuz also presents a different message when drawn in a reversed position: One may be concerned over what appears to be failed communication, lack of clarity or awareness either in one’s past history or in a present situation.  One may feel inhibited from accepting what is offered.  A sense of futility, of wasted motion, may overwhelm one’s self.  However, that is what is happening and is timely to one’s own process.  If the well is clogged, this is the moment for cleaning out the old.  Reversed, Ansuz is saying, “Consider the uses of adversity.”

Survival – In These Times?

sole-surviving-c

“Mere survival is an affliction.  What is of interest is life, and the direction of that life.”  — Guy Fregault

I know people who, when you ask them how they are, will say automatically, “I’m surviving.”  They say it with a bright, brave smile, as though they’ve battled tremendous odds and come through, bloody but unbowed.  They seem to imply that life is a grim, unfair business.  But in reality, their lives seem easy and secure.

There are others I know with real problems – illness in the family, financial worries, job insecurity and more.  These people might greet you with a smile and bring to the simplest exchange an energy and liveliness that sends you away refreshed.  Such people have the gift of life and share it abundantly.  Like the ninety-seven-year-old woman with thirty-nine grandchildren who greets each one of them by name and has a story and a joke for every one of them.  She lives in their memory as a force of love and vitality.  Her immortality is there, in the love her family bears her.

Each day can bring as many joys as sorrows.  When we are patient and find the courage to invest the best of ourselves, we can truly live and not just survive.

Interpreting the Runes ~ Geofu ~ Gebo ~ Gift

Geofu ~ Gebo ~ Gift

“We’re like that!” is what we say when we are trying to communicate how close we are to another, and by crossing our fingers together.  A union, signified by the cross has been used as a representation since ancient times and implies complete harmony.  Gebo is associated with the planet Venus, the goddess of love.  Whenever this rune is drawn for the person being read, know without a doubt that the person is bringing a matter of the heart.  Gebo is a benevolent influence; however the surrounding runes show more and may even show difficulties in relationships.  When this rune is drawn, the person for whom the reading is occurring is, or will soon be in a general state of relaxation and peace with themselves and the rest of the world.

At one’s innermost level the appearance of Gebo may be issuing a form of warning that some gift – be it money, love or wisdom – is likely to come to the person being read.  We all know that nothing in life comes for free and without some sort of cost.  All gifts imply that equality must be attained; one must give back, equal in value to such a gift, either in this lifetime or the next.  There’s always a price to pay.  In a manner of speaking, this rune speaks to the innumerable laws of karma – “As you sow, so shall ye reap.”

As a result, I recommend that one doesn’t consider the appearance of this rune to be entirely positive.  The outcome may prove to be productive, but not, necessarily positive.  Ignore one’s inherent responsibilities and the outcome could be perilous.

Together, We’re Unlimited ~ Defying Gravity ~ Wicked

Sometimes when I blog, I may just share lyrics to a song which is special to me.  This blog happens to contain the lyrics to “Defying Gravity” from the musical “Wicked” is one of my favorites.  This song and its lyrics have helped get me through some tough times.

Defying Gravity

GLINDA


(spoken) Elphaba – why couldn’t you have stayed calm for
once, instead of flying off the handle!
(sung) I hope you’re happy!
I hope you’re happy now
I hope you’re happy how you
Hurt your cause forever
I hope you think you’re clever!
ELPHABA
I hope you’re happy
I hope you’re happy, too
I hope you’re proud how you
Would grovel in submission
To feed your own ambition

BOTH
So though I can’t imagine how
I hope you’re happy right now

GLINDA
(spoken) Elphie, listen to me. Just say you’re sorry:
(sung) You can still be with the Wizard
What you’ve worked and waited for
You can have all you ever wanted:

ELPHABA
(spoken) I know:
(sung) But I don’t want it –
No – I can’t want it
Anymore:

Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I’m through with playing by the rules
Of someone else’s game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It’s time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes: and leap!

It’s time to try
Defying gravity
I think I’ll try
Defying gravity
And you can’t pull me down!

GLINDA
Can’t I make you understand?
You’re having delusions of grandeur:

ELPHABA
I’m through accepting limits
‘Cuz someone says they’re so
Some things I cannot change
But till I try, I’ll never know!
Too long I’ve been afraid of
Losing love I guess I’ve lost
Well, if that’s love
It comes at much too high a cost!
I’d sooner buy
Defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye
I’m defying gravity
And you can’t pull me down:
(spoken) Glinda – come with me. Think of what we could
do: together.

(sung) Unlimited
Together we’re unlimited
Together we’ll be the greatest team
There’s ever been
Glinda –
Dreams, the way we planned ’em

GLINDA
If we work in tandem:

BOTH
There’s no fight we cannot win
Just you and I
Defying gravity
With you and I
Defying gravity

ELPHABA
They’ll never bring us down!
(spoken) Well? Are you coming?

GLINDA
I hope you’re happy
Now that you’re choosing this

ELPHABA
(spoken) You too
(sung) I hope it brings you bliss

BOTH
I really hope you get it
And you don’t live to regret it
I hope you’re happy in the end
I hope you’re happy, my friend:

ELPHABA

So if you care to find me
Look to the western sky!
As someone told me lately:
“Ev’ryone deserves the chance to fly!”
And if I’m flying solo
At least I’m flying free
To those who’d ground me
Take a message back from me
Tell them how I am
Defying gravity
I’m flying high
Defying gravity
And soon I’ll match them in renown
And nobody in all of Oz
No Wizard that there is or was
Is ever gonna bring me down!GLINDA
I hope you’re happy!

CITIZENS OF OZ
Look at her, she’s wicked!
Get her!

ELPHABA
:Bring me down!

CITIZENS OF OZ
No one mourns the wicked
So we’ve got to bring her

ELPHABA
Ahhh!

CITIZENS OF OZ
Down!

Truth

A Poem About Gemini and Leo in Relationship

Truth

Distorted reality reflected off the pond’s mirror image

Moon showing, the Crescent proudly crowning the night

Stars were circling, Leo passed through Gemini all of it making little sense.

I heard the echo around me. Nothing is as it seems.

I was alone then for others understood not my power.

No.  I knew not how to control it.

So I alone brought my anger there. No one’s fear but mine was present.

The Lightening lashed, screaming for the roar of thunder.

Finally the battle was over. Gentle rain washed me clean of my hurt.

So I knew peace for a while. I slept dreaming of the Gardens I was on my path to.

I glimpsed the Runes.

I breathed deeply of his Aqua Velva cologne.

Tasted the sweet Texas tea.

Waiting for it to all fade away

And to begin a beautiful day.

Written and Composed by Mark Schmitz

MyFreeCopyright.com Registered & Protected

 

Interpreting the Runes ~ Ken ~ Kenaz ~ Torch

Kenaz

On the surface, this rune pertains to gifts. Kenaz is associated with Mars and the spring equinox, when the arrival of new life, rebirth and renewal was traditionally celebrated by people of ancient times. One can make the leap then that Kenaz symbolizes fertility and can portend the arrival of a baby or child.

Kenaz is a masculine gendered rune and relates to the dominant person in the situation for which the reading is occurring. If the person being read is asking about business, then Kenaz implies that the dominant person will be calling the shots or making the offers. If the dominant person is the one being read, the rune cast will show whether the offer should be accepted.

The same applies to personal relationships, as Kenaz signals that the dominant person in the relationship will be soon offering a gift. Any surrounding runes in the casting show the motive behind the gift and whether it should be accepted or not.

The torch aspect of Kenaz represents knowledge and spiritual enlightenment to “light the way.” One may be required to use their own inner knowledge to help light the way for someone less fortunate than themselves.

Kenaz Reversed

Kenaz signifies loss when drawn reversed. A potentially rewarding business deal will fall apart. If it is a child one is hoping for, Kenaz reversed signals they are false hopes, false alarms, and infertility. Kenaz may also signal the loss of an employment situation or relationship. Never fear however. Kenaz isn’t just about gloom and doom. The loss shall be only temporary or altered by the surrounding runes on the field, indicating any loss could be temporary.

When You Find it Difficult to Find the Words

My first attempt at blogging began in 2005 on what was then Yahoo’s “360” page; Yahoo’s attempt at developing an option to MySpace.  I wasn’t sure at first what I’d write about.  I considered the process of blogging as similar to the process of my daily journal entries I make (written as though no one will read my entries but me); blogging is written with the understanding that the entire world has access to read.  My awkward attempts began with simple posts that included personal information I felt someone could relate to or may find interesting.

I soon realized that people reading my blogs were hungry for more blogs specific to crystal meth, spirituality, gay relationships, relationships affected by severe mental illness (SMI) such as  paranoid schizophrenia, bi-polar disorder and narcissistic personality disorder, domestic violence in gay relationships and anything addressing the sharing of experiences along one’s path of personal growth.

I love writing and have made some very good efforts at expanding my writing style, to include short stories for children as well as poetry.  The feedback I receive from readers is always welcome and often acknowledges my painstaking efforts to share with rigorous honesty.

Some days, I can’t seem to connect with any one topic at all, and the words I search for to describe my feelings aren’t there.  I may be tired, depressed, anxious, worried or any other emotion that blocks my ability to write.  Unable to write, I found myself getting lost in my other world of digital art, photography and photo editing. The first time I experienced “writer’s block” I resorted to posting an image I had found which conveyed a message and required nothing more from me. That first image was the one in this blog today.  As I read the words in the image above, I slowly began to relate to them in my own feelings.

If you are a committed blogger like me, give yourself permission to be easy on yourself some days.  Post a picture or image that you feel may share a story with your readers.  It’s OK to take the easier route some days!