That Spinning Wheel Will Go Around and Around

As Long as you let it

“There’s nothing worse than taking something into your head; it turns into a revolving wheel that you can’t control.”                                                    — Ugo Betti, Italian Judge, Playwright (1892-1953)

When something really gets to me, it can easily turn into an obsession. I’ll think that one thought over and over; 24/7. I’ll worry over one particular thought like a bulldog in a meat shop. This obsessive thinking, if left uncontrolled in my mind will lead me eventually to the deep dark shadows of depression.

I believe that I became obsessed by fantasies that spun around inside my head like pinwheels on a windy spring day. At times it became difficult to imagine real people, in real situations. I kept repeating images that were real only in my fantasies. Eventually, I realized these fantasies were closing me off from a world of truth.

To break free, I needed to take dramatic action with both my psychiatrist and therapist. I attended a weekly group session and found that by talking and sharing with others, I was able to learn from their experiences. I continue to walk a path that leads out into life and away from those spinning wheels of my obsessions. I am learning to live a life away from my mad world of obsessions and I’m reaching out and getting free.